Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Hiram Brown On Town Affairs



Next time they have a meetin’ in this here ol’ sleepy town
You kin bet your bottom dollar I am jest-a-goin’ down;
I am goin’ to tend that meetin’ an’ I’m goin’ to hev a say
‘Bout the awful things that’s happenin’ in this quiet town today.
Why it’s got to that condition that a man din’t skurcely know
Where he’s at or what is comin’, what to do or where to go;
An’ I tell you friends an’ neighbors things are goin’ mighty fast
An’ they’ll be an’ awful smash-up ‘fore another year is past.

It was bad enough I reckon when they split the town in two
An’ a noisy, pesky railroad come a-tootin’ puffin’ through;
An’ we wan’t accustomed to it ‘fore the wheel craze struck the town,
An’ for years I’ve had to dodge ‘em comin’ up or goin’ down.
Why, my life it wan’t worth nothin’ ‘cuz no matter where I’d be
There was allus one a comin’ seems so right on top o’ me,
An’ I dursn’t go out evenin’s, an’ was scat all through the day,
But twan’t nothin’ to the danger that we’re facin’ now, I say.

Cars an’ hosses an’ bicycles wasn’t fast enough for some,
So they had to go an’ git these autermobile things, by gum!
An’ they go a-stashin’, tearin’ ‘through our streets jest like a shot,
An’ I allus feel like climbin’ up the tallest tree I got,
An’ I dursn’t go out drivin’ cuz my hoss is scat to death,
An’ by jinks, when one is comin’ why the hull town holds its breath!
That ain’t all the trouble, neither, now the latest in the air
Is a trolley line to finish what the rest has left, I – I swear!

Why, if this thing keeps a-goin’ I shan’t durst to look out the door
Lest I go an’ raise a winder on the very upper floor.
Ez for goin’ to the village why they’s none of that for me,
Things have come so fast o’ late years that I don’t know where I be.
No sir, I’m goin’ to stop it if my vote will help the deed,
“Fore the town is spiled completely by this appertite for speed;
Next time they have town meetin’ I am jest a-goin’ down,
An’ you’ll hear the strong opinions of your uncle Hiram Brown.



April 14, ‘07




No comments:

Post a Comment