Boom Yourself

                                 I.

There is no use in trying, friends, to push along these days,

In following the same old path, those slow, old-fashioned ways;

The world it moves along so fast you’ll stay upon the shelf,

If you don’t come from out your shell, and loudly boom yourself.

                             Chorus

Yes, boom yourself for all you’re worth,

    It is the only way;

Convince your friend you own the earth,

    And hold it in your sway.

Convince your friends you’re mighty big,

    And take up lots of room;

For sneers and jeers care not a fig,

    But give yourself a boom.

                                 II.

Where’er you go, whate’er you do, remember this advice;

To think of everybody else, of course, is very nice;

But while you’re doing things like that the world is on the run,

So you would better boom yourself, – look out for “Number One”.

                             Chorus

Yes, boom yourself for all you’re worth,

    It is the only way;

Convince your friend you own the earth,

    And hold it in your sway.

Convince your friends you’re mighty big,

    And take up lots of room;

For sneers and jeers care not a fig,

    But give yourself a boom.

June 17, 1895

Pub. in B. Courier,

June 23, 1895