‘Breaking’ a Bad Habit

            

One day an old man sat out in the sun

Pulling his pipe when his eyes filled with fun;

Removing his treasure, so fat and so sleek,

He asked it a question, and patted its cheek.

“What would you do if I were to-day

Take you and lay you forever away?”

“You cannot do that,” said the pipe growing red;

“If it weren’t for me you soon would be dead.”

“Tut, tut,” said the man, “Don’t talk to me thus,

“Be careful or else you will stir up a fuss.”

“O ho!” cried the pipe, “from the depths of my bowl

I’ve shortened your day and poisoned your soul.”

“I am your master; you are my slave;

‘Tis useless to beg and folly to rave.”

“Hold, you small varmint, we’ll see who is boss!”

And with that he gave it a powerful toss.

It broke on the doorstep, but with its last breath

It cursed the old man then lay cold in death.

If anyone wishes bad habits to rid,

They should stir up a fuss like the old man did.

Jan. 17, 1891

Pub. in Camb. Press