A Good Claimer

“I claim,” said William Henry Jones,

     (Bill Jones the grocer man)

“That I am jest ez much account

     As any other man.

I claim I know my biz niz here,”

     Said he, in risin’ tones,

“Ez well ez Carnegie knows his,”

     Said William Henry Jones.

“I claim that we are equals all,

     Each in a diffrunt line;

An’ Roosevelt an’ his career

     Ain’t much ahead uv mine.

Fur all I ain’t no college man,

     I don’t make any bones

Uv tellin’ people what I claim,

     Said William Henry Jones.

Then William claimed a good deal more,

     An’ claimed it good an’ strong;

An’ emphasized it with a look

     Of scorn upon the throng.

Then someone nudged Jed Martin who

     Said calm as ever wuz:

“I’ve allus noticed claimin’ is

     The best thing William does.”

Jan. 28, ‘10