My Stage Girl

                   I.

O, I know a little maiden who is wondrous fair to see;

A charming, dashing fairy, full of fun and witchery;

She is good, she’s tender hearted, but she puts me in a rage,

For she has a horrid failing, namely, “Struck upon the stage”.

                         Chorus

                 And it’s prink all day,

                 In a reg’lar stagy way;

          Her laugh, her talk, her smile, her walk,

          Doth some great actress always mock;

                 And what to do,

                 And not to do,

     I cannot tell, but know I well,

     That something I have got to do.

                             II.

She’s the bell of every party, she has lovers by the score,

But she gives them all the mitten, so she tells me o’er and o’er;

She has promised me to marry, when she first becomes of age,

But I somehow wish she hadn’t – for she’s “struck upon the stage”.

                         Chorus

                 And it’s prink all day,

                 In a reg’lar stagy way;

          Her laugh, her talk, her smile, her walk,

          Doth some great actress always mock;

                 And what to do,

                 And not to do,

     I cannot tell, but know I well,

     That something I have got to do.

                             III.

Now I’m that sort of fellow who enjoys a quiet roost;

I want a woman who can give me now and then a boost.

I want my meals right on the spot, and cooks I can’t engage;

But how can I expect it from a girl “struck on the stage”?

                         Chorus

                 ‘Twill be prink all day,

                 In a reg’lar stagy way;

          Her laugh, her talk, her smile, her walk,

          Would some great actress always mock;

                 Now what to do,

                 And not to do,

     I cannot tell, but know I well,

     That something I have got to do.

March 18, 1895

Pub. in Boston

Courier, March

31^st, 1895