The Barber and the Bunco

Da beega man he com’ for shave,

     An’ gatta een my chair;

He wanta face massage, an’ want

     Cologna for hees hair.

He tipa me an’ geeva me

     Seegar weeth banda on;

Den aska me, so lika frand:

     “You maka playnta mon’?”

I tal heem I mak’ gooda leev’,

     Not mooch besides. He say:

“I showa you how maka mon’,

     Beeg rolla evra day.”

He show me rolla he has made,

     Fi t’ousan’ dollar; my!

“I lika for maka heem,” I say,

     An’ dan he weenk hees eye.

“I maka heen New York,” he say,

     “I maka sam’ for you;

Geeve me one t’ousan’ for eenvest,

     I breenga you back two.”

I theenk awhile, dan say to heem:

     “Oxcusa me, my son,

I tanka you all the same, but I

     No lika New York mon’.”

March 3, 1910